Sunday, November 14, 2010

Have you ever spent weeks watching a person, and thinking to yourself, 
"I'd really like to get to know that person" 
and then one day you decide that today is the day you're going to talk to that person and you were correct and they were everything you'd hope they'd be?
EJ: I have a hunch that this "person" would be a guy.
Jace: ….Um..… yeahhh

Jace: I got chewed out by my very unemotional aunt today
EJ: Why?
J: About not taking driving seriously
E: What'd you do to deserve that?
J: Don't ask
E: oooohhhh, that can't be good
J: Okay, okay, I drank while driving
E: ....
J: Like took a sip of water during a straight stretch
E: How were you not taking driving seriously? WAIT A SECOND
J: What?
E: Were you drinking flavored water missy?
J: Yes....
E: Because you know what that'll do to your judgement!!!!
J: Wait, it was just coffee, like espresso
E: Oh, now that's BAD!!!
J: I know, DUI, I could be arrested
E: Under the influence of caffeine. That can be very dangerous
J: Very much so.
E: Can you do a breath test for that?
J: I wonder
E: We are so weird
J: I know it. You want to know a lethal combination?
E: What?
J: Coffee + Cute Boys + Driving
E: That would be bad
J: So bad indeed *laughs manically* I JUST SAID INDEED!
E: I was thinking of anything we could add to that
J: Oh! + Rap Music
E: Could you imagine driving while drinking coffee with cute boys in every seat with rap music blaring?
J: *shaking with laughter* What a music video
E: Could you imagine watching something like that? What a drivers ed movie!
J: Oh my gosh
E: Think about the lives that would save!
J: Oh yes, the dangers of DUIC
E: That is totally what we're doing this summer
J: So all the girls caught in the situation of driving with rap music, cute boys, and coffee know what to do.
E: Uh huh
J: Yeah, but knowing me we'll have to pay the cute boys like $50 an hour with my driving
E: Omigosh.... but if we did a video we would be driving while drinking coffee with cute boys in every seat and rap music PLUS a camera! That might be too much of a risk.....Well if I was driving it'd be more like $80
J: The camera is the clincher
E: I feel we should just text instead
J: Texting would add a lot of variables to this situation
E: Oh, definitely. You could even drive with your knees!
J: Oh my gosh, we are such daredevils
E: And at random intervals I can point out things on the side of the road so you'll look away
E: I think this is getting out of hand. I mean, we could even be arrested for having this convo
J: Yeah, probably
E: Seriously, if some cop reads this, they'll have to track us down
J: Or at least one of my 100+ drivers ed teachers. YOU START DRIVERS ED SO SOON!
E: Yeah, I know, I'm nervous
J: You'll do fine
E: It's kind of cool but it still freaks me out
J: I'll sneak up on you and jump out of the bushes
E: While I'm driving?
J: Yes, and I'll scream BWAHAHAHAHA
E: I think I'd kind of win if you did that
J: Huh?
E: Sorry, but the car is bigger than you Jill
J: I am an evil genius
E: Or an evil idiot..... just sayin'
J: It would plow me like a pancake
E: Definitely, especially cos it's a Suburban. And it's black too, so I could make a cool getaway
E: We should definitely put that in our video
J: Just to show what happens when you play chicken with a car
E: Definitely
J: Between you and I, America will never look at drivers ed the same way!
E: How did we even start talking about this?
J: I'm tired
E: How can you be tired?
E: NO! I'm just going to show them this conversation and tell them you're encouraging bad behavior in teens
J: That would really be screwed up after all we've been through
E: Oh, that is true. Maybe I should reconsider.
J: Maybe
E: Especially since I came up with half the ideas
J: Everyone accuses the drinking, stealing, smoking, drug dealing teens as being the bad ones
but they never look out for the evil geniuses such as ourselves
E: Yeah, they're just so naive
J: To quote High School Musical, "We're all in this together!"
E: We are evil, HSM quoting geniuses
J: That we are, Emma, that we are
E: I don't think you can be a genius and quote HSM
J: Aw, that's too true
E: I know, it's sad. We need to find something else to quote.
E: That'll fix the situation
J: How misunderstood we are
E: That's it! We only text and drive with cute boys because we're misunderstood!
J: We are poor rejects
E: I mean, if anyone had an excuse, it's us
J: Misunderstood we were left to a life of crime
E: I know...... it was the coffee that started it
J: We didn't know the caffeine was so addicting!
E: No one told us!
E: It was just a taste.....
J: They evilly pushed caffeine upon us
E: We didn't know it would lead to so many things... the rap music was next
J: One thing always leads to another
E: The influence that has on you while driving.... I just thought I could handle it all
J: You wouldn't believe it
E: Then the boys asked for the ride....
J: Oh my gosh
E: We thought we could handle the pressure, then my friend pointed out a cute puppy and it was all over.
J: We had to break under the stress of it all, there was no escape
E: It just lead to more coffee, we had no other way to cope
J: And then I had to jump out of the bushes and scare the %#*@ out of the driver
E: And all that coffee had effected me so much
J: That was the next event in our downward spiral
E: It wasn't on purpose
J: The jumping out business
E: She just came out so fast
J: It was pretty fast
E: I didn't have time to react, I mean, she was only standing there like, two minutes and you know what coffee does to you
J: It was the evil starbucks lady. She led us down the wrong road.
E: WE WERE INNOCENT!!! Innocent I tell you. And the boys were yelling at me too...
J: Because they said I was flirting with the puppy...
E: I swear she wasn't! Wait.... you were actually flirting with the puppy?
J: NO!
E: I swear I didn't know!
J: They thought I was flirting cos I was petting it... it was actually a lot cuter than them...
E: Officer, I swear I had no idea! Oh wait... I agree with her again.
J: Cos we were getting all nice a cozy
E: It was a cute puppy
J: It had brown eyes
E: The boys were just jealous
J: Of the attention, you know officer?
E: We wanted to get it's number so we could text it while driving, but he wouldn't give it to us
J: Said something about his iPawd being out of texts
E: Yeah, but then we went back to the boys because the puppy was out of our league
J: Totally
E: But they were still mad at us
J: So we gave them candy
E: And more coffee. It worked.
J: Yeah, that helped
E: Definitely
J: Pretty soon they were back, and ready so after even more coffee....
E: We had to go to Starbucks again
J: We went dancing on the roof
E: I don't remember how we got the car up there
J: No, wait, it was the car roof, remember?
E: Oh yeah!
J: *pokes Emma in the ribs*
E: Sorry, it's a little foggy because of all the caffeine
J: Yeah, we were trippin'
E: I'm totally telling my Mom about this, she'll laugh so hard
J: You sure she won't get ticked at me for being such a bad influence?
E: Maybe I should reconsider. You were pretty bad, encouraging me to drink coffee and look at puppies, then jumping out the bushes.
J: It all started the day we pulled into Starbucks, remember? I'm perfectly innocent.
E: Yeah, me too officer!
J: I learned my lesson after getting squashed like a pancake, remember officer?
E: Yeah, don't you think we've learned enough?
J: Hey, Em, how did I resurrect myself again?
E: I don't know, I was in a black Suburban making a speedy exit, remember?
J: I know, but what about my brave tale of survival? Where does that fit in?
E: I did text 911, but they didn't reply
J: Aw, shucks, Officer, you owe us one!
E: Jillian, can you imagine what other people, not misunderstood people, would say if they read this?
J: Um, no
E: They'd probably lock us in a white room with padding on the walls
J: I hope we at least have bubble wrap
E: Yeah, that would be good. Do you think they'd put us in the same room?
J: Probably not, but I hope so
E: Yeah, although we'd probably have a better chance of getting out if we weren't together
J: We seem to entertain each other quite well
E: And our insanity seems to multiply

Ummmm, yeah. Please don't get us arrested,
Kay, thanks.